Undertones of War, Edmund Blunden
Yesterday, I asked Ruth if she had finished her papers and I expected her to be over the moon. Today, people asked me if I had finished mine and I suppose they expected an exclamation of relief and overwhelming elation in response. I suppose I have to deflate their expectations because I feel sad.
Yes, I feel sad.
No more mugging with my beloved classmates. No more mischief in class that seems to drive teachers and classmates alike into desperation and laughter. No more 'Juicy Friday' talks before Mrs Yap's tutorial during lunch in the void deck. No more waiting for each other to get changed into that unglamourous yellow PE shirt and dark blue FBTs. No more queueing up for chicken rice or YTF together. No more hunting down of people to pay for the hefty sums incurred from buying endless copies of answer schemes, case studies and lecture notes. No more hiding of Sher's possessions in the toilet, on top of the whiteboard or in Rekha's pocket. No more discussion of hair balding suffered by victims of ponytail tying...No more accounting of attendance to teachers (shh..YAY!).
Part of me wants to embrace the exciting world of a 7-month holiday, but the rest of me is still under inertia, because my school experience, especially with my class, is too precious to be let go now. BUT, all things come and go. :(
I have never attached so much feelings to a group of people before. To tear apart or modify them would be painful for me. But what can I do?
I feel S-A-D. Today, we were discussing of what to do for tomorrow, or rather, how to fill up the void in our lives that has been dedicated to each other in school for almost 700 days. Movie-watching, prom dress shopping, playing squash and such are activities that can't last for ever. There will come a time when our meetings will become less frequent till it becomes non-existent. I am sure we all know this, but at least, by still seeing each other frequently during the December holidays, the void can be temporarily filled.
During the ride home, Joyce shared how Amos says he feels very sad because all that daily mugging in school is now over. Will we change 5 years down the road? Will some of us get married? Will some of us migrate overseas? Will some of us choose not to have any reunion gatherings? Will some of us change so drastically we wished he/she had stayed the same?
I feel sad.
Yesterday, I asked Ruth if she had finished her papers and I expected her to be over the moon. Today, people asked me if I had finished mine and I suppose they expected an exclamation of relief and overwhelming elation in response. I suppose I have to deflate their expectations because I feel sad.
Yes, I feel sad.
No more mugging with my beloved classmates. No more mischief in class that seems to drive teachers and classmates alike into desperation and laughter. No more 'Juicy Friday' talks before Mrs Yap's tutorial during lunch in the void deck. No more waiting for each other to get changed into that unglamourous yellow PE shirt and dark blue FBTs. No more queueing up for chicken rice or YTF together. No more hunting down of people to pay for the hefty sums incurred from buying endless copies of answer schemes, case studies and lecture notes. No more hiding of Sher's possessions in the toilet, on top of the whiteboard or in Rekha's pocket. No more discussion of hair balding suffered by victims of ponytail tying...No more accounting of attendance to teachers (shh..YAY!).
Part of me wants to embrace the exciting world of a 7-month holiday, but the rest of me is still under inertia, because my school experience, especially with my class, is too precious to be let go now. BUT, all things come and go. :(
I have never attached so much feelings to a group of people before. To tear apart or modify them would be painful for me. But what can I do?
I feel S-A-D. Today, we were discussing of what to do for tomorrow, or rather, how to fill up the void in our lives that has been dedicated to each other in school for almost 700 days. Movie-watching, prom dress shopping, playing squash and such are activities that can't last for ever. There will come a time when our meetings will become less frequent till it becomes non-existent. I am sure we all know this, but at least, by still seeing each other frequently during the December holidays, the void can be temporarily filled.
During the ride home, Joyce shared how Amos says he feels very sad because all that daily mugging in school is now over. Will we change 5 years down the road? Will some of us get married? Will some of us migrate overseas? Will some of us choose not to have any reunion gatherings? Will some of us change so drastically we wished he/she had stayed the same?
I feel sad.
1 comments:
A goodbye isn't painful unless you're never going to say hello again.
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