Someone Save Me

Every one needs the Saviour. No, not a saviour, but the Saviour.

There are people who are not ready to come before dear Jesus: atheists, agnostics, so-called freethinkers, hedonists and believers of the many different religions. Does denying God's existence mean He really doesn't exist? How does one vindicate the definition of who God really is, so much so as to confidently deny that He is not found in any religion, or more specifically, our Christian faith? Being subjective and affective by our physiological and spiritual construct, how is it possible for one who freely thinks, but yet is servant to the world?

I was looking at the angel's proclamation of the good news in Luke 2. Why did God send him to say that there is a Saviour, and that his coming was good? The lives we live on earth are marred with many sinful, unpleasant and violent people, things and events. To come to the Saviour on our knees is to be saved from these things, how can this be not wonderful?

I guess sinful, unpleasant and violent happenings make us think of places and people stricken with religious extremism and sensational cases of rape, theft, murder and whatnots. Are we, the average Joes and plain Janes, pretty much free and happy in this world? Some people go into endless relationships callously, only to come out hurt and plunge into another one, with the intention to satisfy emotional and physical desires. Some see the need to use vulgar, abusive language and seek pleasure in deriding others so as to feel part of a group. Others see achievements and accolades as the pride of their survival in tough competition. Others make frenzied trips to places of worship, while being worried constantly whether he would win the lottery bet he made last Saturday. I hope I made my point here: the world is not a happy place. And in our myopic view, to try to satisfy a void for that is which pure and good, we use more things of the world in an attempt to fill it up. No matter how we twist and turn reasons and motives around, using the things and people of the world cannot fill our void because of the sinful nature of the world. It's like eating a candy when you're terribly famished each time after a good swim or a long day of work: the hunger doesn't go away. You eat more candies but it doesn't help substantially and makes your health worse instead.

But dear Jesus, being high in heaven, came down to earth for the sole purpose to die for every one's sins. God's utter holiness requires us to be clean and unblemished, which is why Christ's crucifixion on our behalf is needed to make us clean. He has atoned our sins on our behalf. For that, we become renewed in mind and in spirit, that we can see beyond the current world we live in, to look to eternity in heaven above. We know where we go after death, and this knowledge that is kept in the heart truly shows at the deathbed. Without Jesus and therefore the surety to go to heaven, can one die truly in peace? Can he put his mind off his family, the fate of his assets and leave? Can he be so assured as to know where he will go after death?

I'm reminded of Luo Wen's example. Luo Wen was a Hong Kong movie star, a men of great accomplishments and accolades. Yet when on his deathbed, he asked, "When I die, where will I go?" The people around him then couldn't tell him. We may brazenly and callously exclaim carpe diem, or evade the question, but death comes to all. When we are at our last breaths, can we boldly, assuredly ask Lord Jesus to wait for us at heaven's gates?

December and Camps

December has been a busy month for me, and now that we're almost coming to the end of the month, I'm glad to conclude that the exhausting and highly occupied schedule was refreshing and rewarding . I've had the chance to serve in new ministries, such as the youth fellowship and my own, while continuing my service in the music ministry. Just some stock-taking so that my one month of learning won't go to waste.

1. Youth Camp
I helped out as a mentor for the primary school kids along with my own primary school Sunday School teacher and two other young adults. It definitely isn't easy to manage mischievous kids who are often liberal with their mouths and fists, but I appreciate the labour of love. It must be a very tiring job to quell the active kids, but it is noble at the same time, that one can take on the challenge so as to help the next generation grow in the Lord. Looking at the youths reminded me of the passion and go-getter-ness then: fancy waking up at 6.30am for quiet time, sharing, sermon and sharing (all done by noon). It was a little tiring for me, and I was on the verge of falling sick. Thank God for a very supportive, joyous team of mentors, most of them having been my own youth mentors. We came up with a skit on the last night based on the Parable of Lazarus and the Rich Man and it was great fun, not forgetting the Jesus' moral of application too.

2. Happy Camp
That's my fellowship camp. We had it at Netheravon this year, which is literally near the east coast of Singapore. Travelling took up at least 2-ish hours daily, but thank God it wasn't that boring, though exhausting and often expensive. I enjoyed the small and long chats I made with people from my fellowship, especially when i seldom talk to a lot of people other from closer friends.

I'm glad to have come back from the camp with 3 treasures: the sweet feeling of close fellowship with closer friends, precious encouragement and advice from a heart-to-heart talk with my beloved mentor, Shu Juan Lao Shi, and the important truth of spiritual zeal and fervour (Rom 12:11). The speaker, Brother David Weng from Maranatha BP, illumined me with the metaphor of coals. Coals burn hotly when heaped together, but cools and dies quickly when a piece is being isolated from the heap. Which Christian doesn't want to be zealous for the Lord? I want to! And so I was reminded of a few people who have backslid, and grown lukewarm or cold to our dear Jesus.

I remember in Pilgrim's Progress, Goodwill pulls Christian in from the gate with urgency, because Beelzebub and his men shoot arrows from a nearby castle to kill people who try to enter the gate, where they'd be safe. Sometimes when we go into spiritual doldrums, we may be weak in flesh, and that one pull from a sibling-in-Christ brings us back to the Lord. For many months, I've been able to talk about church mates who have backslid. But where is the Mary who will offer herself for God's use, to take the initiative to bring words into action? I want to help, so I pray God gives me more directions and wisdom on this.

3. Carolling with the ACJC Choir
Wonderful, wonderful music-making - thank God. I'm glad to have been able to help make the college choristers' memories of carolling beautiful. Spending time with fellow alumni has made me less of a hermit, unexposed to happenings and concerns of friends heh. It's wonderful too, that people whom I know who share the same faith are not just limited to my church. What carries great significance for me this season is singing Rutter's Magnificat for the Singapore Lyric Opera's Christmas concert, Simple Gifts. It was highly amusing to see how girls swooned over the conductor, Joshua Tan Kang Ming. I really feel very, very blessed that I have an opportunity to sing with an orchestra. Being a chorister, accompaniment is at most, done only by the piano. But to sing with an orchestra is mp3 music come to life! Amazing, amazing. You see the percussion, the woodwind, strings and the brass all come to live and piece their own tunes into a greater framework, with nuances and intensity shaped by the conductor. Add on the chorus and voila: Rutter's choral masterpiece comes to life.

Some people see singing as a powerful instrument to convey expressions and emotions, because of its ability to express language. I think music that is otherwise is sometimes more powerful, because it requires the player to interpret the message embedded within, and leaves the listener haunted with the wordless music that brings deep emotions that may be diverse. One example for me would be Tomaso Albinoni's Adagio (for strings).

4. Christmas Carolling and Cantata-Service

My carolling group was very cooperative and in one mind, something I truly thank God for. I had an assistant leader who really helped make up for my easily-flusteredness and forgetfulness. We went to houses of church members who wanted to host the group, unbelievers were few or none, so the outreach turned out to be a reminder for fellow churchmates about Christmas. What was encouraging though, was that there were noticeably more people who wanted to believe in Christ during the Christmas Praise Service. Thank God for rewarding our efforts in singing and preparation by using us to touch stone hearts. I'm glad God used me to save someone.


Only a week left to the end of December and the start of the new year. What spiritual bread the two camps have given to me is to love fellowship and have wisdom for application. I thank God for the wonderful music-filled Christmas season, I can't wait to sing some more :) I do seriously think my body's going to crash within the next few days, I feel incredibly tired at 10ish pm, and my body ache and fatigue seem to persist for weeks. Which means I'm going to hit the sack.

Goodnight! i hope you had a meaningful and blessed Christmas too.

Separation

Separation divides people, things and events

Separation is usually a sad occasion
such as graduating from wonderful junior college life
where friends were real friends and loved each other

Other sad occasions can be sending a beloved classmate
off to overseas to study
and sending more classmates off to overseas as they go to
the other side, where the grass is greener, i think

think about loved ones - that's what i do.
separation can be physical
like how a wife pines for her husband's safety as he works overseas
it can be emotional too
like how parents' empathy and advice is being shut out of
an angsty outraged teenager's heart

Heart, is not just a muscle in the circulatory system
It is the centre of all thought, intellect, emotions and soul
When your new handphone gets stolen,
your heart aches terribly; your brain doesn't.

Dozen times have I thought about separation in life.
Separation through death, and eventual reunion with our Lord above

Above are just some examples, and i've thought of one more
which i believe is a heartbreaking separation
when people are blinded by extremist unfounded doctrine
the spiritual separation on understanding God's Word is painful

Painful sia, the Singaporean says when he feels separation.

But I know God's Will is good even in separation.
Men and their wives long for each other and treasure each other
because absence makes the heart grow fonder
angsty teenagers can return like the prodigal son
maybe they wont return soon, but God keeps His sheep together
and He shall not give up on His herds

Hurt's usually the precursor of recovery and revival
like how blood donation increases metabolism
and how dengue patients recover and grow strong

Strong and stronger will people grow then
(i'm reminded of Olympics' 'Citius Altius Fortius')
that through the refining and a call for discernment with the logic
the intellect, the common sense, the faith God has given us
Separation in spiritual understanding, emotion, physical closeness
are all in God's plan.

Knowledge and Knowledge

FAITHFUL " Yea, if a man have all knowledge, he may yet be nothing, and so, consequently, be no child of God (I Cor 13:2). When Christ said, 'Do you know all these things?' and the disciples had answered, 'Yes,' He addeth, 'Blessed are ye, if ye do them.' He doth not lay the blessing in the knowing of them, but in the doing of them. For there is a knowledge that is not attended with doing: 'He that knoweth his master's will, and doeth it not.'

A man may know like an angel, and yet be no Christian; therefore your sign of it is not true. Indeed, to know is a thing that pleaseth talkers and boasters; but to do is that which pleaseth God. Not that the heart can be good without knowledge, for without that the heart is naught. There is, therefore, knowledge and knowledge - knowledge that resteth in the bare speculation of things, and knowledge that is accompanied with the grace of faith and love, which puts upon a man upon doing even the will of God from the heart: the first of these will serve the talker; but without the other, the true Christian is not content."

Pilgrim's Progress by John Bunyan (1628-1688)

Faithful talks about two types of knowledge: the superficial one and the real one. The one with superficial knowledge is like a Pharisee, who may give unto God abundant praise adorned with fanciful embellishment from an empty heart, because the knowledge is deemed exclusive from application in real life. An ex-mentor of mine said that it is important to let youths understand and appreciate that God's Word is real and keenly intertwined with our lives. "Application", he said. I find this a very important truth, that it is best we turn superficial knowledge (when/if we have it) into real wisdom while we are young, as Ps 90:12 and Eccl 12:1 teach of the need to use time profitably. Superficial knowledge can be springboard for a person to go either one of the two near-extremities: emotionalism (as seemingly encountered by numerous friends) or self-righteousness (personal experience).

Emotionalism: I feel God


God is a spirit, and so we need to worship with our hearts (John 4:24), which is important for the soul (ref Prov 4:23). This is a really wonderful requirement because the Holy Spirit is able to work within us: worshipping the Lord gives us joy, seeking solace from God gives us peace and sharing frustration with God gives patience. We can boldly say we are the children of God and are participants of the mutual love-ship between God and us. Pure rituals of any kind as a substitute for this requirement to offer our heart (and its emotions) to God just will not work because it will divorce the very need for our hearts to be involved when we are in fellowship with God.

Yet some given too much emphasis on the emotional aspect, claiming that feelings are all that is in our relationship with God. Worship sessions are highly charged, but followed by an afterward sleeping pose in preparation for the sermon. Daily experiences are seen to involve supernatural/miraculous elements, and sometimes some claim that they have visions of God, the casual attitude and its credibility of which John MacArthur questions because of the people's intrinsic utter fear and respect when God, the Almighty and the Holy One, appeared to them in the Bible. When emotional involvement with our Lord becomes emotionalistic involvement, I think it can be dangerous that one's overemphasis on the abstract can be used to deceive and blind himself from the stains on his spiritual garment, when God wants us to persevere in the process of sanctification. Some claim they do not go to church, do not have their daily spiritual Quiet Time bread, do not see the need to cut off smoking and incessant clubbing, alongside other behaviours that God clearly expressed His abomination for in His Word, with emotionalistic defences that only set up barbed wires on the path to being closer with Him. If we have such knowledge of sensitive, emotional experiences that is only used to prevent ourselves from doing the things He actually wants us to, this knowledge becomes superficial and barren.

Self-Righteousness: I know God better than they do


Then here's the other extreme: studying so diligently and knowing God's Word so well that some uphold their own Pharisaic knowledge as being superior over others' faith. While well-equipped on the Biblical knowledge, these fervent students run their own ships into the rocks of arrogance and pride, which easily leads to self-righteousness and a consequent judgement of others from a self-assumed moral vantage point. As in James 4, God resists the proud, people who are unwilling to submit themselves under God's will. Going to this other extreme defeats the purpose of discovering God's revelation to us through His Word.

I'm reminded of Jesus' parable of the tax collector and the Pharisee (Luke 18:9-14). The Pharisee chose to pray aloud in the public so that people may see his piety and praise Him. 'God, I thank you, that I am not like the rest of men, extortioners, unrighteous, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week. I give tithes of all that I get.’ For the one who is convinced of his righteousness and thus despises others, Jesus says that he will be 'abased' (AKJV). When our Lord said that our righteousness must exceed that of the Pharisees (Matt 5:20), He meant to exceed the superficial knowledge, that which is purely applicable to the head and filtered away from the heart.

Finding the Balance --> Real knowledge

Real knowledge is God's wisdom, a treasure map that Christians seek so as to know God's will. Faithful says that real knowledge is knowledge accompanied by the 'grace of faith and love', resulting in the application of it 'from the heart'. In this way, the two extremities are avoided and we can find ourselves being a Christian with committed passion and diligent and thirst to know Him through His Word. As the Singaporean version of the saying goes, 'Whoa, can kill two birds with one stone leh, like buy one get one free', Christian love and duty, emotions and logic can come together. God's Word is alive and is thus fully applicable to our everyday lives. It won't make do that one is greatly emotionalistic but doesn't apply God's teachings in his life; it won't make do also, if he puts himself on the altar for being able to ritualistically practise God's teachings, overlooking the importance of the heart. In Matthew 6-7, Jesus illustrated the balance well: neither the law nor the heart are lesser than each other (5:17, 22, 28, 44, 6:18). Therefore, in having real knowledge, God's wisdom, is to apply what is learnt, with the heart and the head.

I know I didn't talk about the body. But here's another picture to sum it all up teehee!

My Junior College Class

Yesterday my class (2AA3)met up again. We were supposed to have a midday movie marathon, which was spent with Olie, Grace and Sher watching HairSpray. The rest of the people turned only during dinner, but it was really awesome this time round. Dinner was homecooked by Auntie Cy and us girls. I shall upload that one very precious photo of the fully laid dinner table that JT took when he uploads it. We spent a good two hours eating and chatting, and I could see some of us so supportive of the labour and love put in they ate every dish. Every dish meant a great deal of food, so much that most of us were bloated. Some of us finished another movie -Shrek the Third and finally left to reach home before midnight.

Thanks to Grace and Sher for being fantastic grocery shoppers - we managed to help one another amongst our muddle-headedness, didn't we? Thanks to Olie for hosting us for at least the fifth time, she's been a really hospitable and loving Miss Treasurer. I owe her a big pat on the back. Thanks to the rest of the people who turned up: Si, Simin, and especially Sam, JT, Haz, Ivan, Kenneth, Mos. It's really encouraging to know that a long day at work didn't stop them from coming.

A year ago, so many of us were lamenting about bidding farewell to college times and college classmates, and we wondered if we would still meet up and continue building upon the friendships made. I'm glad that in Singapore, it's not too difficult to keep in contact because it's a small world here. Almost everyone knows almost everyone else. But I thank God even more, that meeting up with my 2AA3 friends strikes a chord in my heart. It feels sweet and fuzzily warm inside, especially when I know we encourage each other in the Lord. It's wonderful how we're still so onz (Singlish cyber lingo) about catching up with one another.



2AA3 2006
Top Row from left: Amos, Si Hua, Rekha, Jonathan, Ivan, Olivia
Bottom Row from left: Daphne, Hazri, Arina, Grace, Simin, Chestine
Missing (for some it was because it was the last period of the last day of school? heh): Samantha, Melissa, Ankita, Sherlyn, Adiba, Joyce, Kenneth

Thank you, dear 2AA3. We've got many more years of reunion to go!