Oh no...

Have you ever felt guilty, feeling that you've said something wrong?

No, not offensive, but inappropriate, or disappointing.

Or that you didn't offer the help to others when you ought to?

I feel terribly guilty, even though it may seem trivial. Am I too sensitive?

I feel terribly guilty. :s

Cheap Bodies

Price of the human body: S$40.

Price of the human soul: Christ.

Visual DNA

I got this from Joycie's old blog:

http://ardour---euphoria.blogspot.com/

It must be boredom that's driving me to try such stuff, but the pictures are really beautiful. You should do it too : )

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

Happy Money

The Wonder of Income:

You spend it on the ones you love.

Goldfish Eyes

Have you seen such people before? Half or more of the eyeballs protrude from the face. They have shallow eye sockets, a bodily deformity that causes their eyes to resemble those of a goldfish.

Earlier this afternoon, I saw this boy with goldfish eyes. He was about 5 years old and was at the seats waiting for his turn at ICA. He asked his mother if he could play the Gameboy (that freaky gadget that hooks people's souls away >:( ), which he and his sister shared. Naturally, his sister refused.

'Mummy, but you said after she plays, it's my turn,' he said sadly.

His mum then decided that the winner of 3 rounds of scissors-paper-stone would get to play that Gameboy. He won, but under the whining nuisance of the sister, his mum told them to play another 3 rounds so that the boy would lose and his sister would get to continue playing.

He was obviously disappointed and that really struck me.

Is it because of his extraordinary condition that God has compensated him with such a gentle and meek heart? Must it be that humans must be ugly-looking before they have truly beautiful hearts? And is it because of his meekness that people can bully him?

His mother's biased decision stung an old wound of mine. She knew her son was more obedient and loving, so she exploited that to keep his sister contented.

My brother was the most beautiful child in the family, but his slight dyslexia and weaker intellectual development made parenting so frustrating that inappropriate methods of punishment were used on him when patience ran out. Nonetheless, God blessed him with such a heart of humility and meekness that he would always be the one who helped run family errands or be at the losing end in friendships. Because of that, I remember him always having to give in to me and my other siblings, because he would not throw tantrums and could tolerate unfair decisions. Sometimes it still happens now. Maybe that's why he bears grudges and can get antagonistic at times.

Now that I've got past the age of wanting to be victorious all the time, I want to help mend this wound of the family. I don't want to get into petty tiffs. I want to be a blessing and encouragement to him. I regret only doing this after 15 years of biased treatment, but I suppose there is no true remedy for the old wounds except for God's providence and keeping.